Always forgiving others

The topic of forgiveness is prominent in Scripture. Thanks for highlighting this subject with your question.

Forgive fully and unconditionally

A number of passages indicate we are to forgive unconditionally, whether or not others express repentance, show remorse, or offer any apology. Please read these thoughtfully. Matthew 6:14,15 instructs us to forgive human beings with no explicit mention whether or not they are believers or are repentant. Mark 11:25 and Luke 11:4 call us to pardon “anyone” and “everyone” without distinction. Seeking pardon for his crucifiers, Jesus mentioned their lack of comprehension (Luke 23:34), but contrition or regret are not in the picture. The Fifth Petition of the Lord’s Prayer likewise provides no explicit or implicit condition of repentance linked to pardoning our debtors. We have ample evidence to say believers are to forgive fully, unconditionally.

I suspect your question may stem from passages that focus on our forgiving fellow believers who express repentance. Luke 17:4 as well as Christ’s powerful parable in Matthew 18:21-35 explicitly address forgiveness among Christians. Contrition and repentance always play a role here. You might also be thinking of our high privilege to forgive or not forgive sinners in administering “the keys” in ways that reflect prior repentance or impenitence (see Matthew 18:15-20; John 20:21-23). This tells us much about how we are to communicate with fellow sinners as God’s representatives on earth, but nothing removes from us the sacred, personal obligation to forgive unconditionally.

Communicate forgiveness wisely and lovingly

Our culture makes a big deal about victims forgiving criminals who wronged them. Remorse is sought from the guilty, and when those victimized express forgiveness, they are praised. The greater needs of the guilty, namely, godly repentance and divine forgiveness, are typically ignored. That’s a shame. It’s wonderful when sinners forgive other sinners, but God’s forgiving sinners is far greater. This is the message we are fully qualified to share with the world. So as we forgive others personally and unconditionally, we do well to think about how we communicate this to those who sin against us.

How might we offer clarifications as we affirm our full forgiveness to others? Especially to those who have wronged us yet have given no evidence of contrition before God or reliance on Jesus as their sin-bearer, we may say:

I fully and freely forgive you, sinner to sinner. I hold no grudge against you, seek no retaliation, and will keep no record of wrongs. I have no desire or need for this. My Lord Jesus is my ultimate Protector, and he will satisfy justice in the end. Vengeance is his to give, not mine.

But please understand that this actually may mean very little for your long-term well-being. If and as long as you do not repent before God of your sin, you do not enjoy the forgiveness Christ earned for you. You forfeit personal benefit of his pardon. You have my forgiveness, given cheerfully in love. But just like me, a sinner like you, you need the personal enjoyment of Christ’s forgiveness, which is also freely given. I am willing to do anything I can to help you enjoy this.

Our responsibility is to forgive others fully, unconditionally. As we communicate this, let us also speak wisely as well as lovingly so that we will best serve our neighbor.