Living together before marriage
Why do some pastors in the WELS excommunicate their own for living together before marriage and other WELS pastors accept them the way they are, even knowing what they are doing is wrong? Thank you.
Excommunication is the church’s declaration that a person’s impenitent attitude has placed himself or herself outside the kingdom of God. This is the last step of loving discipline outlined in Matthew 18:15-20.
Because disciplinary circumstances vary and, perhaps even more importantly, we may not have all the information of how a pastor and a congregation are in fact addressing sin in the lives of congregational members, we do well to refrain from passing any judgment on them (Romans 14:13).
Certainly, sin calls for rebuke (Luke 17:3). Motivated by love and concern, a congregation and its pastor will seek to call sinners to repentance so that the good news of forgiveness can be shared and then received in faith. Appropriate fruits of repentance follow.
The proliferation of couples living together before marriage definitely presents pastors with ongoing challenges in addressing sin and interacting with the family and friends of those involved. So, pray for pastors. If you have a question they can answer without breaking confidentiality or departing from the guidelines of Matthew 18:15-20, do approach them. Theirs is a weighty responsibility to warn people about sin (Ezekiel 33:7-9).