Forgiving others
What is personal forgiveness? I do not want to hold any grudges, but how do I know if I've forgiven? Online I see sites titled with "5 steps to forgive" or "Have you personally forgiven someone?" I will not look at those sites. This is not a work of oneself but the Holy Spirit. I do pray that others, different people, come to the Lord to trust Him and be forgiven in Christ. This "forgiveness question" has bothered me for quite a while and I do not know why. I have prayed earnestly about this. I'm not even sure sometimes what my question is! I know that the Lord will settle me.
If a fellow Christian has sinned against us and confesses that sin to us, we are to forgive (Luke 17:3-4). Forgiving other people in general is what God looks for us to do (Matthew 6:12; 18:21-35). Jesus warns against withholding forgiveness (Matthew 6:15).
What if someone who has sinned against us does not confess that sin to us and remains impenitent? In that and every situation the Bible instructs us to “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger…” (Ephesians 4:31). We may or may not have the opportunity to say to such a person: “Even though you have sinned against me and have not confessed your sin to me, I forgive you and do not harbor any animosity toward you. I do not like what you did, but I forgive you because my God tells me to do that. Your sin is between you and God. I pray that you confess your sin to him so you can enjoy his forgiveness” (1 John 1:8-10) If we do not have opportunity to have that conversation, those ideas at least reflect what is in our hearts as God’s children.
I hope thoughts like these address your situation.