Disliking church
So, this idea has been circling my head for a while and I just need to ask. What if I was to say I dislike worship services? Like the plain old every Sunday church services. Not because of I harbor hatred towards God's Word and Sacraments but because I dislike the format. I go mainly because it's one of the few places where I can receive the Means of Grace. I love Bible studies with friends and strangers, personal Bible study, and I even love it every time we use God's word to study in my school classes. However, the format and social standards in church turn me off. I hate sitting still, and that's one of the biggest social standards in church. I have gotten weird looks for bouncing my leg too much in church before... -_- I think I would benefit more if I could bring my own Bible and take notes or do something that makes me critically think, but I feel like I would get judged for that since I already get judged for bouncing my leg too much... Is it sinful for me to not find enjoyment out of regular church services?
Let me begin with this reminder about the challenges you and I face in worshiping our Lord in his house.
Our sinful nature presents one challenge. “I rejoiced with those who said to me, ‘Let us go to the house of the Lord’” (Psalm 122:1). That is the new self in the Christian speaking. The old self says, “I hate the house of the Lord. I want nothing to do with it. I don’t want to be there.”
Satan presents another challenge. “A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up…When anyone hears the message about the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. This is the seed sown along the path” (Matthew 13:3-4, 19). Satan will do what he can to try to uproot God’s word in our hearts and lives. He uses many tactics and approaches to carry out his goal, including the idea that a worship service is just the “same old, same old.”
Other people present still another challenge. “Bad company corrupts good character” (1 Corinthians 15:33). Other people may discourage, rather than encourage, us in our faith and in our desire to worship the Lord in his house.
You can see that we need God’s strength to overcome these obstacles and barriers to worship the Lord in his house with joy.
So can I like or dislike something about worship services? Sure, and when I say that I recognize that I am speaking about personal preference and taste. I may not like how something is done in a worship service or I may not particularly like the melody of a hymn, but I recognize those “likes” are just my opinions. I realize that the worshiper sitting next to me may very well like what I dislike and vice-versa. I myself realize, from the perspective of a worship planner and worship leader, that I cannot possibly please everyone when it comes to conducting a worship service. So, perhaps, thinking of fellow worshipers might put your “likes” and “dislikes” into perspective.
So what can you do in connection with your questions and concerns? Let me pass along some suggestions (not knowing whether or not you are already doing some of these things).
Pray before worship. There are prayers in the hymnal for “Before Worship” (Christian Worship, page 10). You can offer your own prayers—asking that God bless your worship in keeping you free from distractions and enabling you to stay focused on the worship service particulars.
Use the hymnal (or service folder) to follow the order of service. Like many worshipers I can keep my hymnal closed and keep up with the liturgical responses, but I find greater meaning when I see what I am speaking.
Bring your Bible? Yes. I see fellow worshipers here and there with Bibles on-hand, and some even taking notes. I can tell you from the vantage point of the pulpit that it is encouraging to see that. I wouldn’t worry about reactions from others in bringing a Bible or taking notes. Do what it takes to stay focused in the worship service. Maybe your actions in these areas will give a fellow worshiper the idea to do the same.
Worship services are special times: God comes to us through word and sacrament; we give God our praise. In this life we recognize that our praise of God will always be imperfect. If we recognize we have sinful attitudes toward worshiping God, we confess those sins and receive God’s forgiveness in faith. And then we try to worship God with better efforts.
Finally, address your concerns and questions to your pastor. He is in a position to explain the services that you attend.
All this effort is worth it because we do want to follow our new self especially in this area of life. We do want this refrain to be a way of life: “I rejoiced with those who said to me, ‘Let us go to the house of the Lord’” (Psalm 122:1). God bless your efforts.