Placing a child for adoption

It is not wrong to place a child for adoption. It is, however, often a painful decision. Within the Christian context there are two ways to look at it: biologically and beneficially. The biological perspective is that parents have a responsibility to raise their own children (Isaiah 49:15) or to entrust them to immediate family when they cannot (Exodus 2:1-9). The beneficial perspective focuses on benefiting the child’s needs.

The Bible presents a clear, general directive: love God and love others (Matthew 22:37-40); family members head the list of “others” whom we are to love (1 Timothy 5:8).

God consistently describes the immediate family as mother, father, and child(ren). This is the ideal setting for raising children (Ephesians 6:1,4). Where there is no mother or father because of death or divorce, other family members and friends often take an active role in helping to raise the child(ren). Sadly, when a child is born outside of marriage, the child’s mother often is left to raise the child alone.

When is it appropriate for a child to be placed for adoption? Because the biological mother often is the one facing this decision, let’s use her perspective.

She typically is alone, perhaps young, poor, or facing some malady that makes it difficult for her to raise her child. Her decision often is complicated by an emotional attachment or a sense of biological duty. But she needs to remember God’s command to be more mindful of others than of herself (Philippians 2:3-4), prayerfully consider whose welfare is being best served, and what is best for her child physically and spiritually.

It isn’t wrong to place a child for adoption with someone else if there is reasonable assurance that God’s directive on how to raise a child (Proverbs 22:6) will be met and that the child will learn about Jesus as Savior and Lord (2 Peter 3:18).

Birth mothers often describe making this difficult choice as “placing” their child for adoption. They view it not as a surrender but as an important parenting decision they are making for their baby.