How do I forgive myself?

Are there unforgivable sins, and how do I forgive myself?

The Bible speaks of an unforgivable sin.  It is the sin against the Holy Spirit (Matthew 12:22-32).  That sin amounts to a permanent and malicious rejection of the Holy Spirit’s work.  That sin is unforgivable because that permanent and malicious rejection of the Holy Spirit cuts off people from the Spirit, who alone can connect people to the forgiveness Jesus Christ won by his holy life and sacrificial death.

How can you forgive yourself?  You take to heart what God himself says about your sins.  “I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more” (Isaiah 43:25).  “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).  If God has forgiven you your sins, you have every reason to forgive yourself.

Perhaps the memory and shame of your sins is what is troubling you.  Remembering specific sins can certainly keep Christians humble and reliant on the grace of God in Christ, but don’t think that in any way your forgiveness is affected by your memory of personal sins.  God gives you his word—through his word and sacrament—that he has forgiven all your sins.
So, I would encourage you to think daily of your baptism.  In that “washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit” (Titus 3:5), God made you his child and wrapped you in the forgiveness of sins Jesus Christ won (Galatians 3:26-27).  I would encourage you to turn to God’s word daily and the Lord’s Supper often to be all the more strengthened in the faith that your sins are forgiven.  Finally, do speak to your pastor.  He will be glad to speak the news of God’s forgiveness to you and help you to forgive yourself.  God bless you.